When Carson Is Tapped, You Are Not Racist

Regarding Republicans, "The Magic Negro" refers to the conservative desire to find a black man who holds all the right conservative views but whose skin color will, finally, for real this time, prove to the leftists who hold the keys to Georgetown Dinner Parties that they are not racist. "The Magic Negro" is slightly different in reference to the left, primarily because they don't care about what Republicans think of them. In reference to the left, "The Magic Negro" is a black man who is coherent and capable enough that he can run as the front man and so bludgeon conservatives on their racism and privilege.

Ben Carson was the Magic Negro of 2016, replacing Herman Cain, who in turn had replaced Colin Powell. It's somewhat important to note that the term "Magic Negro" does not inherently marginalize the individual's actual talents, but merely mocks the idea that that talent somehow justifies being made the leader of a national political party. I say inherently because frankly, there are Magic Negros who aren't even particularly good in their supposed area of expertise, but simply are nonthreatening enough and the cuck desperate enough to let even that deficiency slide. Neil Degrasse Tyson is the most current example of the full blown case, and if I had a time machine I'd bet my last Reese's Pieces that George Washington Carver would at the very least be a borderline case.

There are certainly those that think Carson and Cain fall into that camp of being all shuck and jive, and others who acknowledge that the two are indeed Magic Negros but that it is unfair to claim they don't have a very respectable list of core competencies. Pick you poison.

As an aside, my preferred term for Magic Negros in modern parlance is "Google Plus".

So with that out the way - Ben Carson has been tapped to head up HUD. With an understanding of what we mean by Magic Negro, and that - politically, at the very least - Ben Carson is one, here are my thoughts:

1. If anyone could marginalize that Magic Negro card, it's Trump. Trump is rewarding Carson for his loyalty, and while there's probably a good chunk of influence demanding to have a Magic Negro in the cabinet, it's a lot less an influence on Trump as it would be for a cuck. Trump is under no illusions that by choosing Carson he's tapping into a magical force that will neutralize his opponents, nor does he take screams of RACISS seriously.

2. Carson has actually lived in public housing, so I'm counting this as a plus. This isn't always the case - I wouldn't want a guy who had never been employed to be in charge of Labor on the basis that he "knows how tough it can be" (arguments as to whether anyone should be in charge of Labor notwithstanding). But just as I think there should always be a non-lawyer, non-Ivy SCOTUS justice, Having a guy in charge of a department where he had to eat some of the shit handed out by said dept... well, why not give it a whirl?

3. And... not much else. Carson was loyal, is not a lifetime politican and has seen the end-user side of the department, but he lacks any depth in relevant experience and is a danger of being given a pass (by the right) for being a Magic Negro.

I'm giving him a 6/10. If he were white, he'd be seen at best as a smart loyalist who is bland enough to not offend any wing of the party. That he's not a Bushman would give him a +1 with the party base. So 6/10 if white, 6/10 as black.

Personally, I wish HUD would be weaponized to shove diversity down the throats of those who like to virtue signal that America needs more diversity. Section 8 housing at Martha's Vineyard. Subsidized housing to move kebab (before final deportation) from Ohio to San Francisco. Urban Development that moves yahoos into (((homogeneous neighborhoods))). Properly enriching top tier public schools.

But that's probably a step too far for most people right now, so using HUD to repay a Trump loyalist who hopefully is up to the task seems the next best thing.

Election Pop Quiz

In memory of the big, beautiful election we just had: Remembering The Primaries

1. Before he was low-energy, Jeb! was
A) An embarrassment
B) A big, fat mistake
C) A mess
D) A real tough guy


2. "Disgusting" BEST describes:
A) John Kasich eating a Hoagie
B) DNC abusing Bernie supporters
C) Hillary lying about Honest Abe
D) Rosie O'Donnell


3. Who of the following was the first person, who, to be very honest with you, shouldn't even be here tonight?
A) Jeb Bush
B) Ted Cruz
C) John Kasich
D) Little Marco


4. A water bottle represented Marco Rubio's:
A) Foam parties
B) Profuse sweat
C) Spittle
D) On-screen water drinking


5. Chris Christie famously committed a murder-suicide against this Cuban:
A) Ted Cruz
B) Fidel Castro
C) Marco Rubio
D) John Kasich's sandwich


6. Trump will NEVER:
A) Win a primary
B) Get 25% of the vote in a primary
C) Even be competitive in a purple state
D) All of the above


7. Before Jeb!, there was:
A) Forward with Jeb
B) Stand Tough With Jeb
C) Jeb Can Fix It
D) Jeb For President


8. This candidate actually lost to Trump, twice:
A) Newt Gingrich
B) Carly Fiorina
C) Ben Carson
D) Rand Paul


9. Trump first broke the 50% ceiling officially in this historically racist state:
A) Georgia
B) Connecticut
C) Mississippi
D) Texas


10. Jeb! was interrupted and forced to stop mid-speech by his hosts at:
A) A Relay-For-Life fundraiser
B) A church picnic
C) A fundraising event in a private home.
D) A Rotary Club meeting

Drain The 9th Circle Of Hell

California went Democrat at a rate of 2:1, and is at the point of serious-not-serious as to whether or not it can tolerate being tied to the rest of us.

Hawaii, America's great Coldwar Exhibit A that The Free World, Inc. was open to non-white majority countries, went by the same ratio.

So did the People's Republic of Massachusetts.

The nation's capital, on the other hand, went to Clinton by an absolutely staggering 19:1. This is Yuge.

Now yes, I am aware that California, Hawaii, and Massachusetts are states, and therefore have some degree of variance throughout. But consider: The San Francisco area peaked at 75%. Parts of Boston pushed towards 90% but the city as a whole was around 80%. New York City was around 80%. Atlanta, in the mid 70's. Portlandia, 70's. Seattle, 70's. Chicago, 75%. Even Baltimore... 85%. So even when only compared to the bluest of the blue urban areas, Washington, D.C. is an extreme outlier.

The only thing this election more alarming (though not unrelated), was the fact that somehow not a single national paper was in sync with half the country, comprising north of fifty-million voters. Looking at DC, the only conclusion is that we are ruled by a capital that has less in common with the people it claims the authority to govern than London ever had with India or Versailles had with The Vendée. Something many of us have always instinctively understood, but it's amazing to see it play out by the numbers, every four years. It is a city that is foreign, hostile, and absolutely thrilled to find itself so separated from the occupied territories.

President Donald J. Trump is literally entering a warzone. Keep your memes locked and your shitposts loaded lads; we won an important battle that the enemy couldn't really believe was actually being fought. But now they are terrified, and the next battle is on a battlefield that they know well and where every pedocuck and (((global lobbyist))) has spent a lifetime honing xir skills. Things are going to get much worse before they get better, because the swamp is going to do everything it can to avoid being drained.

But when it does, I believe that the change - the sudden disappearance of an oppression so old it never fully registered - will be so profound on the American people that liberalism can be destroyed for generations. This is why we must win, and to do that we must appreciate how desperate the enemy will be to prevent us from doing so. Don't get cocky.